1. Design a program that makes it possible for deaf people to use text messaging.
2. Comb hair twice daily with laser comb
3. Stop the homeless from feeling sorry for themselves.
4. give a little
5. keep it going
6. Join one of the armed forces
7. Be able to tell someone: "Ive never missed one day of work for 25 years."
8. Keep a smokers pipe in one hand while giving advice to someone.
9. Feel sorry for my weaknesses
10. Trust my second guess
11. Grow a nice full beard and tell lots of jokes at family gatherings and cocktail parties.
12. Use these adult like phrases in my everyday conversations:
* Politics
* Old wives tale
* Been there,done that, got the t-shirt.
* String trimmer
* Here's $5, go buy yourself a high ball.
13. Learn how to smile like Kenny Rogers.
14. When asked if Im thirsty, always reply with "Tom Collins".
15. End most of my sentences with "see what I'm saying?".
16. Don't wake up saying: "I didn't sleep good at all".
17. learn how to say: "Hey, look at me!" and "Why do you care?" in Japanese and Mandarin
18. Get in an argument with a blind person about politics.
19. Wear a monocle whenever I go to return anything to the store.
20. Become more convincing
21. Calm down an angry dog
22. Tell it like it is
23. Wear a black turtle neck with a tan blazer to a nice Chinese restaurant and use the phrase "between the sheets" after each person reads their fortune cookie.
24. Figure out the real reason why in the 5th grade I was kicked out of Junior Great Books.
25. Tell the ones I love, that my love for them would be greater, but I'm a Sagittarius and we are drifters and don't like to stay in one place for too long.
26. Learn to laugh more maturely.
27. Wear a t-shirt that says: "Live, Laugh, Love"
28. Sell live baby turtles on the corner of a busy intersection.
29. Become an occasional smoker.
30. Make up a good joke that ends with the punchline " I'm a rhinestone cowboy".
2. Comb hair twice daily with laser comb
3. Stop the homeless from feeling sorry for themselves.
4. give a little
5. keep it going
6. Join one of the armed forces
7. Be able to tell someone: "Ive never missed one day of work for 25 years."
8. Keep a smokers pipe in one hand while giving advice to someone.
9. Feel sorry for my weaknesses
10. Trust my second guess
11. Grow a nice full beard and tell lots of jokes at family gatherings and cocktail parties.
12. Use these adult like phrases in my everyday conversations:
* Politics
* Old wives tale
* Been there,done that, got the t-shirt.
* String trimmer
* Here's $5, go buy yourself a high ball.
13. Learn how to smile like Kenny Rogers.
14. When asked if Im thirsty, always reply with "Tom Collins".
15. End most of my sentences with "see what I'm saying?".
16. Don't wake up saying: "I didn't sleep good at all".
17. learn how to say: "Hey, look at me!" and "Why do you care?" in Japanese and Mandarin
18. Get in an argument with a blind person about politics.
19. Wear a monocle whenever I go to return anything to the store.
20. Become more convincing
21. Calm down an angry dog
22. Tell it like it is
23. Wear a black turtle neck with a tan blazer to a nice Chinese restaurant and use the phrase "between the sheets" after each person reads their fortune cookie.
24. Figure out the real reason why in the 5th grade I was kicked out of Junior Great Books.
25. Tell the ones I love, that my love for them would be greater, but I'm a Sagittarius and we are drifters and don't like to stay in one place for too long.
26. Learn to laugh more maturely.
27. Wear a t-shirt that says: "Live, Laugh, Love"
28. Sell live baby turtles on the corner of a busy intersection.
29. Become an occasional smoker.
30. Make up a good joke that ends with the punchline " I'm a rhinestone cowboy".
5 comments:
Randy,
You are still funny, and of course, a little on the weird side, buy you make me laugh.
Shari Lee
Well, you may not be able to calm down an angry dog, but you sure as hell were able to make one crap itself. You're proudest moment is also one of my funniest memories of you.
Glad to see you back on the blogosphere, I thought for a moment you went down with the 7eleven fire.
Rand,
Your writing and wit always has me laughing. The way your mind works leaves me in awe.
June
Randy hey i ran into your blog, good stuff. what are you up to these days, Im still in the same complex on mckellips come stop by so we can goto lunch. and hey you never finished that detail.
Later Nathan Babbitt
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